This Is War

I have a long and distinguished history as being a NOT yard person.  I like yards.  I just don’t like working in them, owing to the fact that I’m allergic to 95% of what grows there and simple chores like weeding make my skin whelp up for days.  And I live in Mississippi, where it’s hot 8 months out of the year.  The yard at this house is bigger by a fair piece than our last house.  More to mow and definitely more flower beds.  Hubby keeps up with the mowing pretty well, but the flower beds haven’t been in any great shape since we moved in May of last year.  The seller’s husband had died and on top of that, I got the impression that they weren’t much for yard upkeep either.  So when we inherited it, the whole thing was in dire need of mulch and weeding.  Which we just…didn’t get to.  We were focused on getting the inside unpacked and set up, and then it was hot.  Then it was raining.  And we all know I’m permanently busy.

Over the last year and change, I’ve had a few blitz clean ups when the flower beds started looking like sleestak habitats, but with all the rain this summer, it just keeps coming back.  So we had a landscape service come out to give us an estimate on what it would be to clean EVERYTHING up and mulch.

I couldn’t stomach the price tag on that, so yesterday I got out and declared war on the weeds.  4 GINORMOUS bags of them (naturally garbage day isn’t until Friday).  Charged up our electric weedeater batteries (hubby hates the thing and doesn’t use it, but I am a fan of the whole “press a button and go” of electric) and went to town on the front (it was so bad, the 2 batteries we had didn’t last past the front).  Pruned all the trees.  Rounded up the front flowerbeds (which thus far seems to have done absolutely NOTHING).  There’s still more to be done by…a LOT, but I ran out of juice after all that.

And by bedtime I HURT.  Didn’t sleep well last night, despite painkillers.  So I didn’t run this morning.  By the time I woke up, my arms and hands hurt so bad, I could hardly move them.  The fact that WEEDS did this to me just pissed me off.  So I’m going to push through and keep going until this is finished.  Because this is war.  I have a personal vendetta against the bastards now.  Finishing with the weedeating first.  Then I’m pulling out the hedge trimmers.  That’s right, you overgrown monstrosities of bushes.  You are on my shit list and I’m coming AFTER YOU.  And if I’m really REALLY lucky and careful, maybe I won’t cut through the cord this time (my mom and I have a habit of this–I come by my anti-yard work penchant honestly).

I’d really love to try the whole kill weeds by laying down cardboard or newspaper (because, hello, that’s easy) but it is permanently windy in our neighborhood, so that would stay down all of 2 minutes before blowing out to the pasture.  But maybe I can do it bit by bit and hold down newspaper with bricks or something.  :glares at stupid weeds:

7 thoughts on “This Is War

  1. I feel your pain. I seriously need to get out there and do something with my yard. It’s not as urgent because you can’t see my yard from the road, but someone MIGHT see it. You know, like the UPS man. LOL. For me, it’s not allergies to weeds, etc., it’s that every bug on the planet can find me and wants to BITE me.

  2. I just got an electric hedge trimmer, but I haven’t used it yet. One tip I got while I was shopping was to take a loop of the cord two or three feet or so from the trimmer and pull it up through the back of your belt (from bottom to top). That helps keep the cord away from the trimmer, but it will pull loose in case of a problem. — Good luck. I am in East Tennessee and everything makes me break out in a rash too. And we won’t even talk about mosquitoes!

      1. I live on a cove of Cherokee Lake, NE of Knoxville, and I am a walking mosquito magnet. And I have three little dogs who like to “kiss” their mama so I haven’t found an insect repellant that works but won’t hurt them.

        1. I use Witch Hazel with Citronella Essential Oil and Peppermint Essential Oil. I haven’t read up on toxicity, but most essential oils are okay for humans when they are diluted. Not sure about dogs.

          1. Where can I get the essential oils? (Preferably online.) I have the Witch Hazel. I am more than willing to try it. Thanks.

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