A Monday Funny

It’s Monday.  I’m tired.  I has no brain.

Ten Thoughts to Ponder for 2009

Number 10
Life is sexually transmitted.

Number 9
Good health is merely the slowest possible

rate at which one can die.

Number 8
Men have two emotions: Hungry and Horny.

If you see him without an erection,
make him a sandwich .

Number 7
Give a person a fish and you feed them for a day,

teach a person to use the Internet and
they won’t bother you for weeks.

Number 6
Some people are like a Slinky

Not really good for anything, but you

still can’t help but smile when
you shove them down the stairs.

Number 5
Health nuts are going to feel stupid someday,
lying in hospitals, dying of nothing.

Number 4
All of us could take a lesson from the weather.
It pays no attention to Criticism.

Number 3
Why does a slight tax increase cost you $200.00,
and a substantial tax cut saves you $30.00?

Number 2
In the 60’s, people took acid to make the world weird.
Now the world is Weird and people take Prozac to make it normal.

And The Number 1 Thought For 2009

“Life is like a jar of Jalapeno peppers;
What you do today, might Burn Your Ass Tomorrow”

6 thoughts on “A Monday Funny

  1. Think I’m done writing for the day, though I might come back to it later. Gotta go supervise the kiddos cleaning their rooms. Word count for today: 1102.

  2. Laughed till I cried – thanks! More than needed today. NPI – 860. The discipline of this is beginning to help me push into the villain stuff – which I believe is what was stalling me out. I didn’t want to get into these guys’ heads, let alone write pages about them. So far so good though.

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